5 Tools to Save You When You’re Stuck
The Conversation Repair Kit
We all know that moment: you’re chatting with a native speaker, everything’s flowing, and then—BAM!—they say a phrase you’ve never heard, or their speaking speed suddenly jumps to 100 mph.
You freeze, panic sets in, and you just... nod.
We’ve all been there. It’s frustrating, but it’s a perfectly normal part of the learning journey!
The good news?
I always tell my students that you don’t need a perfect vocabulary; you need an excellent “Conversation Repair Kit.”
These are the figurative tools you keep in your pocket—strategies you can pull out in a flash to fix communication breakdowns and keep the chat moving.
Here are five essential tools for your kit, including the great ones we talked about earlier, plus three brand-new strategies to help you conquer confusion and talk like a pro!
Tool #1: The Polite Ask-Back
When you simply didn’t catch the words, you need a safe, polite way to ask the speaker to slow down or repeat themselves. This is your first and most important tool.
What NOT to do: Avoid just saying “What?” It can sometimes sound a little too direct or even impolite to a native speaker.
What TO do (Your “Tool Phrases”):
“Sorry, I didn’t quite catch that. Could you please repeat it?“ (The gold standard!)
“I’m sorry, could you say that another way?“ (This is great if you understood the words but not the meaning).
“Wait, did you say ‘garage’ or ‘carriage’?” (Use this for a specific word you’re struggling with).
“Could you speak a little slower, please? Thank you!” (It’s okay to manage the speed of the conversation).
Tool #2: The Context Detective
Sometimes, you hear a new word, but the person is talking so fast that you don’t have time to stop them and ask for the definition. This is where you become a language detective! You need to train yourself to focus on the information around the new word.
Focus on the Surrounding Words: Are the words positive or negative? Are they describing a place, a person, or an action? This tells you the word’s function.
Identify the Main Topic: If you know the conversation is about animals, and they say, “My cat loves playing with a tiny ‘yarn’ ball,” you can guess that ‘yarn’ is a kind of string or material. This keeps the conversation flowing without an immediate stop.
Example in Action: Your colleague says: “I’ve been completely swamped with work this week. I haven’t had a chance to even eat lunch!” You hear: You don’t know ‘swamped’, but the phrase “I haven’t had a chance to even eat lunch” gives you a huge clue. Your guess: ‘Swamped’ must mean extremely busy or overwhelmed. (You were right!)
Tool #3: The Non-Verbal Signal
Your mouth might be stuck, but the rest of your body can still talk! This tool uses simple non-verbal language to signal confusion before you interrupt with words. It buys you a precious second or two to process.
The Head Tilt: A small tilt of the head and a slightly puzzled expression immediately signals, “I’m thinking, but I might be confused.”
The Ear Cup/Lean: Lean forward slightly and briefly cup your ear, as if you physically didn’t hear the sound. This prompts the speaker to naturally repeat or rephrase without you having to say anything.
The Writing Gesture: If you are in a situation where it’s appropriate, quickly mime the action of writing or drawing a word. They will often instinctively offer to spell the word or write it down for you.
Why this works: These small physical actions are universal ways to signal a communication issue. Most native speakers will automatically adjust their speed or repeat the information without you needing to form a sentence!
Tool #4: The Summary Check-In
This is a powerful strategy for intermediate learners because it achieves two things: it clarifies confusion and proves you are actively listening. You repeat the information back to the speaker in your own words.
Use a “Checking Phrase”: Start with a simple phrase that shows your intention to summarise:
“So, let me check I understand. You’re saying...”
“If I’ve got that right, the main issue is...”
“Just to recap, you need me to...”
Fill in the Blank: After your phrase, fill in the gap with what you did understand. This forces the speaker to correct only the part you got wrong, rather than repeating the whole thing.
Example in Action: Your manager says: “We need to finish the final report by Friday, and then email it to the whole marketing team before noon.” You reply: “Okay, just to recap, I need to finish the final report and email it to the marketing team before noon on Friday.” (The manager confirms, and you know you understood the deadline and recipient perfectly.)
Tool #5: The Bridging Phrase
Sometimes you understand the overall topic, but you are waiting for the perfect word to come to you, or you need a moment to translate in your head. The worst thing you can do is stand in silence, which can be awkward. Instead, use a “filler” or “bridging phrase” to buy time!
What NOT to do: Go completely silent, or make a non-committal noise like “Uh...”
What TO do (Your Time-Buyers):
“That’s a great question. Hmm, let me think...”
“That’s interesting... Could you tell me more about that part?”
“Just a moment. I want to choose the right word here...”
“Let me see. How can I explain this...?”
Why this works: These phrases make you sound thoughtful, not stuck. They signal that you are engaged and thinking about their idea, rather than struggling to find the English to reply. It changes the interaction from an awkward silence to a productive pause!
🚀 Takeaway Tip: Practice Makes Progress!
Your English teacher is absolutely right—these are the tools you need in your pocket! Don’t wait for a high-pressure situation to try them.
Choose one new tool from this list.
Practice it with a language partner or even by talking to yourself in the mirror ten times.
Use it in your next real conversation.
Mistakes are not failures; they are opportunities to use a repair tool! Go out there, be confident, and start fixing those conversation breakdowns!
The Plan This Week
We will be focusing on a variety of aspects of tools, specifically for overcoming communication challenges:
Tomorrow, we will take a deeper dive into the word ‘convey,’ to make an idea, feeling, or information known or understandable to someone. It’s a slightly more formal and precise way of saying “tell” or “communicate.”
BizPod on Wednesday will have a new guest, and our last of 2025, where we talk to a lovely lady called Deepika, who will share some more ‘tool’ recommendations! (Available to all readers)
Thursday, we will specifically target inversion and cleft sentences. These structures are perfect for conveying strong opinions or highlighting specific pieces of information.
Friday, we end the week with native expressions for confirmation and clarification.
Remember, only today and Wednesday are FREE posts. If you want to access the rest then you need to become a FULL/PAID subscriber. Now’s the time!